6.1.11-6.1.12.... 1 year later...

They say you will never forget where you were when something life altering happens. For my parents, it was things like the death of JFK. For their parents, it was things like the depression, albeit a bit longer than the death of a prominent American President. For me, it used to be 9/11. A freshman in college, in my dorm room, getting ready for my 9:20 history class (coincidence....). That was until June 1 of last year. Because now, I measure things BT and AT. Before tornado... after tornado... It wasn't that I was injured, and thankfully, (luckily?), the building I was in at the time remained standing, unharmed, probably by the grace of god if you know where we were located... I'm not saying this isn't something life altering for people in "tornado alley" who are more, dare I say, accustomed to this, because when it strikes, I KNOW it's life altering. But for a small town in Western Mass, life altering doesn't do it justice....

Tomorrow marks 1 year since the tornado. A lot has changed since then. You can see forever in my small hometown. Parts of it are reminiscent of being in the Midwest, where it's flat for miles. While there are still hills and valleys, the path through them is empty. From the top of the hill, you can see for what feels like forever. It's only a couple miles, but in a town like ours, where most people can barley see their neighbor's house because of the tree cover, a couple of miles feels like a lifetime.

This past year has passed quickly. There were SO many highs and lows to this year, that it's hard to believe it was all packed into 365 days. So much has changed for so many people and still, continues to grow and change. "the tornado" is a topic of conversation in our town any number of times on any given day. The impact on each individual life varies greatly. Some of us have a seemingly unnatural fear of an impending thunderstorm (me, for example) that I hope will continue to diminish as time passes... I know I will continue to be much more cautious, and at least for a while, scared. I'm ok with admitting that.

There are positive things that came from that day.... Strengthened relationships, new ones formed, and a bond that joins each of us who were impacted on that day....

Tomorrow, I will probably listen to my two saved voicemails from one year ago... One from boyfriend, concerned, just trying to find out if I was ok, and one from my dad, who was just down the street at the time of the storm. Running down to see him in the aftermath is something I'll never forget... He should have been driving home and probably directly into the storm...hugging him is a moment I will never forget.

We change constantly. June1, 2011 should have been a simple day. Instead, it is a day that forever changed my life.... In so many ways.

"How do you measure, measure a year? In daylights, in sunsets, in midnights, In cups of coffee. In inches, in miles, in laughter, in strife."

There are plenty of ways to measure this past year... Especially in our small town. We measure progress and growth and change. And tomorrow, we celebrate the passing of 365 days... One year later.

A Different Feel at Fenway

Last night, we went to see the sox play... Yes, again. It seems like we have been there a lot this season. It's really only been 3 times but it really does feel like more than that. Anyway I digress... A few weeks back, on a slightly rainy, chilly Friday night, boyfriend and I sat out in the bleachers, adorned with long sleeves AND sweatshirts, listening to what would be our final game with Carl Beane. A few days later, the greatest ballpark announcer (in my opinion) passed away in a single car crash on the mass pike. Last night, boyfriend and I were again at Fenway, this time in the grandstand behind home plate and much warmer. It was different. I mean, Fenway is the same. The game is the game... Some are clearly better than others... But it was different. It was a familiar voice (still not sure who) but it was different... It's weird because 5 years ago, boyfriend and I, before he was boyfriend, had our first date at Fenway (June 14, 2007). Coincidentally, that date falls on the same day it did as our first date. Unfortunately, due to our work schedules, we won't be able to go... But again, I'm off topic. Over the past 5 years we have been to a number of sox games, all of which Carl Beane was the announcer. It was definitely different last night, and from now on, there will be something just a little bit different at Fenway... But it will forever be the spot where boyfriend and I took our first photo together, shared our first beers and made our first memories...

Goodnight, Carl Beane....

Having been to Fenway only days ago, I feel lucky to have heard his voice twice already this season. The news is teeming with the talk of Carl Beane's passing...we are actually watching Comcast sports net as I type this and they are talking about him. "the voice of Fenway".... Boyfriend and i were just just reminiscing about fenway and how i will miss hearing my favorite name announced this season... Magglio Ordonez. No, not my favorite player, but one of my favorite things to hear at fenway every year.

You are a part of Fenway that will never be forgotten and I am lucky that I spent my first opening day listening to you...

You will be greatly missed by all of the fans of red sox nation....

Goodnight, Carl Beane... Thanks for the memories...

on top of the world

Last Sunday, after a particularly LONG week and equally long "weekend", puppy and I ventured to my parents house Sunday mid morning. We stopped off to drop off a coffee to a friend who was momentarily car-less and sick on top of that and after the dog pestered her small black cats for a bit, we headed to my parents. They have a new puppy- we lost our lab back in mid November and this new guy has been around since shortly after that... So the problem is that my dog and new puppy are not exactly fond of each other. No, that's not quite right... New puppy is very fond of my dog- fond of chasing him,stepping on him and trying to sniff parts of his body that should never be sniffed... That said, my dog is less than thrilled about any of this. We haven't had them around each other too much because of this but I decided to give it a whirl. Uh. Failure. So, our visit was short lived... Very short. With it still being only about 1130-1200, I felt like I needed to do something with my day and I wasn't feeling the gym. In large part due to the fact that I would have had to bring the dog home first then go back to the gym and I wasn't feeling it.... So instead, we went hiking..I hardly ever hike. Scratch that, this mountain is literally less than 2 miles from my arentsnhouse,where I lived for over 20 years, and I have probably been to the top a total of 3 times prior to sunday- if that. So I decided puppy and I were headed up.... Thankfully, I had his harness and leash (those harness things are awesome... Just saying).

While we were hiking, I was listening to some DMB radio on pandora and texting with bestie. While I don't mind that we took the long route,I'm not entirely sure the dog was too thrilled, but he survived. After what seemed like forever, we somehow made a giant circle and still hadn't managed to reach the top... I knew we had probably just walked past the point where you turn to head to the top but I was frustrated. I texted bestie something about not being able to find the top and how I wished she was with me because she would know where to go... Like a great friend and support, she texted back... "don't worry, you'll find it...but getting to the top isn't the most important part"... I smiled as I read it and when I looked up to figure out where we were, we had reached the path to the top... Her support helped me find it, even though it was just some simple encouragement.... While I would have preferred to have her here, I felt like I reached the top with her...

When we did get to the top, puppy and I sat down to take it all in... Ok, I sat. He sniffed around trying to lay claim on every tree branch in existence and I tried to keep him from going a little too far from the edge... It's amazing, to be up there, taller than the trees that you stood beneath only a short time ago... It makes you feel like up here, you could conquer the world. What really amazes me is that despite the mass destruction that ripped through my hometown almost one year ago (6.1.11), from up there, nothing has changed. And yes, I know it's because of the mountains location in relation to where the tornado hit, but when you are up that high, you expect to see everything as it is from the ground...but it just isn't like that. Up there, there is still preservation of the woods and the trees and from up there, everything looks ok...like its all going to be okay...

When you get to the top of this mountain, there is a little mailbox with a notebook in it. People write all kinds of random things in it... There is the ever popular "hiked thisnw the family" with the date and things of that nature... The random stuff that was probably penned by some high school kid about how there is nothing to do in this town blah blah... And some people write about the reasons they hiked the mountain in the first place... I think it's a bit therapeutic to sit and leaf through some of the things people wrote, so puppy and I went and snagged the notebooks (there were 2 this time) and a pen.... I began leafing through the smaller of the two when I came across the writings of my besties family and friends. They had hiked a few monts earlier in memory of her amazing dad and I began to read all the things they had written... When I looked up to contemplate the way this spot, on the top of a mountain, can be so many things to so many people, a butterfly flew down... It hovered for a few minutes and all I could do was smile. I knew what it meant and I couldn't help but feel like so much made sense...

I decided to write in the notebook, after all, is it fair to read the words of others without leaving your own to share? It was nothing much, just a few words about why I was up there at all, along with the date.... As I finished writing, I went to close the second notebook and happened upon a page long note. This note was actually from two people and I decided to read it... There was so much love and certainty contained in these messages, written to each other, on top of the mountain... In a time where we feel so much that nothing is certain, it is comforting to know that up there, on a giant slab of rock, overlooking the world below you, that certainty exists... That somewhere, in the craziness of life, at some point, everything will make sense...

"...it reminds me that no matter how small you feel today, this spot will make you feel on top of the world..." (unknown)

I can't wait to feel on top of the world again this week....

quote me on this....

I spend a lot of my "free" time (I use the term free loosely) reading blogs, searching pinterest for my next craft adventure or something new to whip up for boyfriend and reading quotes. Yes, reading quotes. If you know me, you know of my obsession with them. I am more than willing to admit that they are and object of my obsession. If I can find a way to work a quote into something, I will. Seriously... Sister's wedding programs; quote. facebook status; often a quote. Laying in bed because the hyper-caf (yeah I'm sure it isn't good for me) coffee that I sucked down is keeping me awake; quotes....
I have a little pink notebook that I carry around in my wallet so if the mood strikes and I find a quote I like, or need or simply know I'll want to incorporate into my life at some point, I can write it down. I have documents on my computer and my iPhone dedicated to these quotes. They range from quotes from movies and books to those of inspirational thinkers and those who for so long have wished to remain anonymous. No quote is too small or too long. I find them walking down the sidewalk and sometimes, quote myself. They make me nostalgic for things in the pass, and thoughtful about the things to come. As a teacher, I try to incorporate them into my classroom and instill my love of quotes to my students. I am a firm believer that the right words are always out there, but sometimes, it takes someone else to use them first.
In part, the almost daily rumblings sprung from my love of quotes. Quotes force you to think, sometimes about the things you swear you could do without. Sometimes, the link you to how you feel at an exact moment, in a certain space that you can't seem to correctly convey with other people. Sometimes, they are there just because- no hidden meaning or agenda- just something you felt like you wanted other people to be able to experience.
I have decided to make this part of my personal challenge. To provide readers with something new to think about and just to put out there some of my favorites. As with anything, there are those we fall back on, the ones we know are always the perfect fit. I will share those, as they apply to my day or the topic at hand as well as search out some new favorites.
I have a lot coming up in the next few months. Changes in my family (yay for new babies) and for my friends (babies and weddings and new homes, oh my!) and in my personal life (more on that later), and I feel like I'm going to be seeking out the perfect words more and more often.....

Life doesn't turn out as we expect it to. When we come out into this world, our future seems as smooth and unmarred as virgin snow. It is an illusion, of course, and soon we weave a web of mistakes and failures as much as achievements and triumphs, and become used to walking on broken pavements rather than on paths of gold. It is what makes life so interesting; one quickly learns that one never knows what is going to happen next. [ e. aston ]

memory lane

The other day I drove to a conference in Boston. The conference itself was fine as far as conferences go but it was my drive there the really got me to thinking. I was driving down 91, trying to make my way to 93 (unsuccessfully I might add-although that is another post entirely) and I kept hearing all these songs that were "it" back around my sophomore-senior years of high school, mixed in with a few that bring me back to college and so many ridiculous things. Anyway- what I got to thinking about was how strongly a song can bring you back to a memory. And I'm talking really specific. The Aerosmith song "I don't wanna miss a thing" came on whilst I was trying to merge into some lovely Boston traffic and it took me immediately back to my junior-ish yer of high school and watching that movie on the couch of my then boyfriends uncle's house. Other than the random newsfeed pop ups courtesy of Facebook, our social contact is limited and has been for quite some time. From what I gather, he seems quite happy and he most definitely deserves that, he was a great guy. Due to the fact that we dated ages ago and I harbor no feelings, hard or otherwise, for him, it was incredibly random to be brought back to that time of my life, especially to that specific of a time and place.

The more and more that I got to thinking about it, the more I realized just how much a song can aid in creating a memory. Or in not allowing you to forget the past. Because honestly, there are times when a certain song comes on the radio and you want noting more than to change the station, only to find the same song on another station. Karma? I'm not one of those people who spends the duration of my day listening to the radio or iTunes on repeat- in fact for me, most days I would rather listen to a tv show while I clean or put laundry away or otherwise... But once in a while, a song comes on that brings me back...sometimes it makes me laugh, sometimes cry and sometimes, just shake my head in disbelief of things that we thought were a good idea....

Weekend Rituals

Almost everyone I know has some kind of weekend ritual. Whether it consists of a plethora of household chores or 6-hours worth of errands to prep for the week, or even to spend the day catching up on a weeks worth of dvr'd shows that you were too busy to watch during the week, we all have some kind of ritual. Since the recent purchase of my iPad, my weekend ritual has changed slightly. Actually, now that i think about it, this ritual change started in California (shocker).

I am a coffee drinker, though not as addicted to coffee as some people that I associate with, but none the less, I have no problem hitting up the dunks drive through on any given morning. However, upon descending into LAX, I was met with the issue of there not being a dunks. Enter bestie and her daily coffee from 7-11 ritual. Thanks to bestie, I discovered a few things:

1. Coffee at 7-11 (or any such establishment) is cheap! (read: under $1.50 for a large coffee)
2. Your coffee is ALWAYS made to order, you don't ever have to send it back and there is no bitchy sales clerk who inadvertently gives you the next customer's order

Flash forward 6 days, back to MA and needing a coffee fix. Since skipping the dunks for a week, I made the decision to try the cumby's at the end of my street. Enter the $.99 coffee, made my way, every time. Enter new ritual.

There really was a point to this back story! Since the new adoption of the .99 coffee, and the new iPad, I have created quite the ritual for myself. Typically on Sunday's (that seems to be the only consistent day of rest in my little corner of the world) I get up when boyfriend gets up to get ready for work. Armed with $1.05 (there is tax on said coffee) I head up to cumby's in my sweats and make myself a coconut coffee (iced or hot, depending on the weather). I laught a little every time I make my coffee (black)because my grandmother once told me that if it isn't black coffee, it's not worth drinking. She heard it from her grandmother and I suppose I'll pass it on as well (thanks, meme're). So anyway... I go get my coffee, come back and snuggle up with coors puppy, either back in bed or on the couch. We spend the next hour or so catching up on blogs, looking for new recipies, perusing Pinterest and enjoying my perfectly made, money saving coffee. And, thanks to today's early morning ritual, I am armed with a new crock-pot recipie, have had my caffeine fix and have saved some money in the process.

It really is the perfect way to spend the early part of the morning.

What is your weekend ritual? How do you spend your much needed and deserved (few mintutes) of "me" time?

on a more serious note.... Addiction

While on vacation, bestie and I had some long talks about everything and nothing, some were really about nothing important or life changing and others were much more in depth and important. We got to talking about relationships, both good and bad and ultimately to talking about addictions- the transition from point a to point b is actually a much more direct route than one might expect. Ultimately, the how and why we got there are less important than some of the things that have since tuck in my mind about it. 

Everyone is an addict 
Long and short of it is that we are all addicts in our own right. The problem with something like addiction is that we are taught, often from a pretty young age, that addiction revolves around things that are illegal or ore wise bad for us. And in part, that is certainly true. Alcohol, marijuana, prescription drugs. These are some of the basic things we most often associate with addiction. And rightly so- these things are all around us and are in our world on an almost daily basis. And while not everyone is addicted to one of the aforementioned things, we are all addicts. Some are food addicts. Some are shopping addicts. Some get a thrill from shopping on e-bay or qvc and others from going into a store and dropping a boat load on shit they don't need. some people are addicted to keeping things and never throwing them away- yes, hoarding. Ultimately, we are all victim to an addiction. It is in our nature to have something we can't go a day without. It's not a far cry to say that as a society we have become addicted to social networking- it too is an addiction. We are addicted to cellular telephones, computers and the like. Like it or not, we are all addicts. 

It's not unusual for us to deny our addictions. 
True, some of these are part of a phase of our lives that may or may not stick with us, but most people deny them. I know far too many teenagers who firmly believe that they are not addicted to smoking pot. But ask them tongoma day without it, without thinking or talking or craving it- most cannot. They are addicted. And for many of these teenagers, it has taken over their lives to the capacity that they cannot see that they have in fact become the worst version of themselves. Addiction at its best. Claiming who we are capable of being and turning us into a variety of different things. Chameleons- destined to change with the people they hang out with on any given day. These people baffle me, in part because I find it hard to believe that you don't realize that you no longer have a true identity. Perhaps that is because I have never been in that situation before...

Addiction does not only affect the addict. 
Truth be told it is often the addict who is least affected. Addicts often do not see the error of their ways and if they do, don't often care, or give the impression that they don't care. The people around them- family members, co-workers, teammates- they are all directly affected by the addict. It may be small things such as dropping the ball on a work project leaving your co worker to cover your ass or it may be more intense, life altering things such as car accidents or worse. In no way are those in the life of an addict sparred because they aren't the one addicted. Life becomes consumed with worry about the addict, and for the addict. Often times family members find themselves trying to solve the problems of their loved one (said addict) often to no avail. It is often not until the metaphorical rug is ripped out from underneath us that others come to the realization that there is a problem. The metaphorical rug is often a small mishap, but unfortunately can be something much more life altering. 

I would like to say that I believe the first step is admitting you have a problem, and to some extent that is true. I think more importantly the first step is not a single step. It is not something that can stand on its own. It is a series of initial steps that ultimately lead to the recovery and hopefully the road to a better life.  I am in no way saying you have to believe me on this but I firmly believe that the first steps to getting better are this: 

Acknowledging that  you have an addiction and that this is an illness. 
Too often, we call it a problem but to me, a problem has a quick fix and should not continue to be a problem. A problem is a squeaky door. Hit it up with dorm WD40. Problem solved. Addiction is a much longer process and just because you are "clean" doesn't mean you don't still suffer from the effects of the addiction. 

Accepting help. 
I don't care who you R of what you are addicted to, everyone needs a support system. Do not shut these people out. Especially the ons holding your hand. Easier said than done but you will know who to weed out- those who promote addictive behaviors, those who do not accept you for the changes you are making to your life. Some will weed themselves out simply because they cannot stand to be around someone who isn't sharing in their addiction. Wave goodbye and don't look back. 

Taking it all one day at a time. 
We all know "Rome wasn't build in a day". Neither is fighting addiction. You can't do it alone and you certainly can't flip a switch. Commit to it. With the right attitude and supports in place, anything is possible.

Write it down.
Your triggers. Your thoughts. Your feelings. Your moments you want to scream at the world. Down the road, when you have a day where you feel like all hope is lost, you will have these bad days to look back on and to help you realize how far  you have come. 

We are all addicted to something, some of us to many things, some of us more than others. It's what we choose to do with it that makes or  breaks us down....

Coming Home (a few weeks removed)

What a long short few days. It's crazy how being away can seem like you were there forever but when you really stop to think about it, you were barely  there at all.  Overall, in only a few short days, I managed to learn a few things about LA and about myself in general.

1.  You have not experienced traffic until you have been to LA.
I mean this. I have been to Boston at rush hour during a home sox game. I have driven through NYC. This, however, is a far different experience and probably what would deter me from
moving to LA in the first place. I used to laugh when I talked to bestie and she was complaining about traffic being nuts. I've been on 495 south on a Friday afternoon. It couldn't be worse could it? It is. It is 495 south, on a Friday afternoon in mid July, all the damn time.

2.  All you THINK you know about he pacific ocean? It's a lie.
No seriously. I thought a. it is always warm and sunny in southern California and yes, I did have above 70 degree weather every day. But the ocean?! That shit is cold. And no, not Maine cold, but a lot colder than I anticipated. Yes, I still put my feet in and unfortunately, most of my pant legs with it but I also put my feet in the Atlantic, in Maine, in December. I'm tapped and I'm ok with that (perhaps a polar plunge soon?) but seriously, it's cold.

3. Everyday, YOU deserve some "me" time and that "me" time should be used.

Everyone knows you need time to yourself. it's no secret. no matter the length of time in a relationship, if you're in one or not, what your job, what your lifestyle. you need me time. and i'm not talking time to run around and do errands and pick up groceries and do things for other people but be alone in your car while you're doing it. after this trip, i know the real meaning of "me time". It consists of time doing what YOU want to do for YOU. reading, writing, curled up in a ball on the couch sipping coffee and blogging, dancing around your living room to some crazy 80's punk band. coloring in a coloring book with a pack of brand new crayola's (because seriously, what else is there?). whist in california, i had the opportunity to really take me time. when bestie had to work, i got to sit out on the porch and read, drink coffee, eat lollipops (they, much like the threaded friendship bracelet, are making a comeback). i took a lot of me time. being with my bestie was much needed me time, in and of itself. but since being home, i have made it a point to spend a few minutes every day, doing what i want to do. lately, it's been reading or coloring while drinking some hot water with lemon (another cali pick up- thanks bean). it might be 15 minutes a day, it might be an hour and 15 minutes a day and it might be 5 minutes. but i've done it, just about every day since i've been back. some days, there hasn't been time for me time because things needed to be done and for once, that was okay. i didn't feel like i HAD to do them. chances are, unless some fairy godmother cleaning squad comes flying out of the sky, the laundry that's there today, is still going to be there tomorrow and no one is going to judge me if i haven't folded it yet... and finally, i'm okay with that. we spend so much time trying to please everyone else that we forget that making everyone else happy can only happen if WE are happy... and that starts with "me" time.

4. it's okay to go away and it's okay to want to come home, and it's okay to miss the people you love in between. 

being gone from home is a strange thing when you have a routine. when you wake up next to the same person, every day, and you cook dinner each night and one of you gets the drinks while the other puts the food on plates, and you know how you'll sleep at night if one of you went to bed before the other... it's strange to leave and to go away and to not have that person, that part of your routine, with you for the time you're away. as women especially, we feel like we have to leave lists and notes and charts and that without us, things will surely fall apart. and no disrespect to men, but sometimes, you give us the impression that you don't have a clue as to what goes on each day to make things run smoothly... and then, we go away and you surprise us. it's not that i doubt boyfriend's ability to remember to take out the trash on friday mornings at the crack of dawn b/c the trash men cannot decided if they prefer to pick up the trash at 7am or at 12pm. it's not that i doubt his ability to remember to feed the dog, except that when asked, sometimes i get the impression that he goes momentarily deaf. he knows how to do a load of laundry and has never turned anything pink that wasn't supposed to be and when it comes down to it, i know he can steer the ship as well as i can... it's okay to step away, to not be in control. and it's okay to want to come home. after a period of time away, it's normal to miss the everyday life and the routine, despite creating a new routine while away. it's okay to miss your significant other, your kids (i don't have any but expect that if i did, it would be hardest to leave them) and your pets. that's OK. taking time for yourself and going away alone allows you time to reflect on all the different aspects of your life. distance really does make the heart grow fonder and sometimes, we all need a little time away to remember how good it feels to be home. 

5. i've said it before and i'll say it again... California (and probably many travel destinations) changes you... 

no hidden message here... i'm different. i didn't believe that i would be and i didn't believe it when bestie told me it would happen. it happened to her. it happened to her previous guests and it happened to me. it's not a big thing, and probably not something a lot of people would know unless you told them (ahem. spolier alert?) but it changes you. you realize that coffee tastes just as good when it costs $1 and is made the right way, that doing things you loved as a kid are great ways to spend some alone time, and putting on your favorite songs and singing at the top of your lungs at least once per day is okay. it's kind of comforting to know that you can alter small things about yourself and in turn, feel that you're closer to becoming who envision yourself to be. 

It's All About Attitude

So today is technically day 2 of my journey to SoCal (although if you are reading this, its well past day 2). Today my bestie had some work things to attend to so we headed down to Beverly Hills so she could head to her work thing and so I had somewhere to explore. I spent the better part of an hour in a cozy seat outside the coffee bean (they dot the streets like dunkin donuts in MA). I brought my kindle as any well prepared, "dining alone" individual would come well prepared with, and I sat and read/sipped my mocha latte/people watched and thus began the basis of this post.

Beverly Hills, while certainly a life style in and of itself, is an attitude. It's glitzy and glamorous, yes; and the stores exude this "please don't walk in here without the triple platinum card" but it's all about how you walk around. And, people who live here don't care. Which makes it that much easier to exude confidence in a place where it is easy to have none.

The thing about beverly hills, and about LA in general is how nice people are. I'm not going to lie, it was the absolute last thing I expected. In a place teeming with movie stars and celebs, no one has to be nice. But they are. Even when you are cutting them off in traffic. And trust me when I say that they make Massachusetts drivers look like saints.

The craziest thing about the LA attitude is that no matter who you are, what you wear, what your job, LA changes your attitude....

About everything.

*post LA note: when someone says "la will change you" just believe them. they aren't big things, they are tiny little things that are unrecognizable to the naked eye but none the less, they are changes and if you're lucky, they are not only positive changes but things that you will carry with you for the rest of your life....

blogging on a plane....

*note... this post was written over a week ago, on a plane, as i was on my way to LA....

Air travel is probably one of the most overpriced conveniences of the world. Think about it. You, along with the roughly 160 other passengers on your flight, or more depending on your airline/trip etc, pay an  exorbinate amount of money simply to get places faster. Don't misjudge- I have no problem packing a bag and hoping on a plane with the best of 'em but I think  it says something about us, as a society, and our inabilities to do anything slowly anymore.

I remember growing up, which in all reality wasn't THAT long ago, and having weekends where everyone, the whole family, was home together. We did things together if we wanted to, not because we had planned them months in advance. Where did that go? Now, weekends are inundated with soccer games and dance competitions and this gathering or that tournament. The weekend exists so that we can say "yay, I have the weekend off" but it is rarely, if ever anymore, a time of relaxation.

But, all this hustle and bustle has taken away from the good old fashioned road trip. Today, flying is the norm rather than the exception. I used to get so excited to go on a plane (oh who am I kidding, I still do) but now, I would pay good money for a road trip. A chance to see the US and to visit ballparks and random points of interest. To spend hours belting out off-key ballads and to spend time talking and being okay with getting lost. A chance to relax and enjoy the company of my loved ones, to fight incessantly with my siblings and to bother my parents with endless rounds of "I have to pee" and "are we there yet"...
But for me, as with so many people today, time is off the essence and getting there faster has become more important than the act of traveling itself. So as my flights begins its descend into the Los Angeles area (current temp 65 and a nice change from the 20 it was when I left at 5am), I am going to make it a point to slow down, relax, enjoy the new stuff around me and the company of my bestie <3 and while I am sure I'll miss my boys, it is going to be so  nice to be away...

* post trip note: it was for sure, one of the most relaxing weeks i can EVER remember... thank you bestie...  I can't wait to experience that type of clarity and relaxation again, be it in Cali or elsewhere...

[trying to get] back in the habit

every new year's eve, people make resolutions about getting in shape and going to the gym and being healthier etc. and every year, the gym packs up big time for about a month before slowly, the snow, or the cold or the flu or some other plauge starts knocking people off the list. bam. bam. BAM. they drop like flies. it happens, we all know it does. and this year, i did NOT make a resolution to do any of those things yet somehow, it's happening. and not just the going to the gym adn the being healthier, but the getting into a routine thing.

last friday, boyfriend and i both had the day off (yay!) to spend together. he was going to go sign up at a gym that's a little closer to his work, but farther away from our house. i headed off to order a bridesmaid dress, passing boyfriend on his way to the gym while i was on my way home to change. i did just that, then headed to get in a workout. except that while driving there, i got a phone call from boyfriend who said the girl wouldn't accept his debit card as a way to process a payment (just for the record, we used to go to that other gym and they had NO problem taking my money out of my debit card....) but anyway. so i get to the gym and he calls and says all that and i suggest going to find out the difference in price to add him to my gym membership. becuase of my AAA discount, my monthly cost would only increase by $15 with is only $5 more than what boyfriend would have had to pay at that "other gym". plus, the facility is better (i think at least). so he gives in and i leave the gym (no workout) and go back home to pick him up. great. we go back, workout together(ish) and head home. by this point it was already like, 230 and we were pretty hungry so we grabbed some lunch, went home to shower and change and ran some other errands we had planned for friday.... on saturday, we had to work different schedules so i went to the gym after work and he went before. then on sunday, he had to be at work early so we decided to go around 8... on a sunday. at 8am. YIKES. i dislike mornings. anyone who knows me knows i hate them. i don't even like to talk in the morning. seriously. it's my silent time. but since i don't usually work till noon, it hasn't really bothered me... okay i'm so off topic...

so we go to the gym at 8am on sunday and obviously by 8pm i was ready for bed. boyfriend wanted to get up and go to the gym monday morning at 7.... yeah. that's what i said... 7... and i know that isn't early for any of my school teacher friends and anyone with a 9-5ish type job, but when you are a] not a morning person and b] don't work till the afternoon, 7am seems wrong... but we got up. and went to the gym. at 7am... turns out, as much as i hate dragging myself out of bed and putting my feet on the cold floor, i actually like having the gym be done and over with early in the day. with this new routine has come even more of a new routine... when we get home, i make lunches [yes, boyfriend can and often does make his own but with this new routine, it's working for us], i wash any dishes that are in the sink, make a cup of coffee in my new keurig, feed the dog, make breakfast and prep anything for dinner that needs preping... then i get to sit down and watch a little tv [rocked some full house this morning] and after breakfast, shower. yesterday i had time to go tanning... today i had time to get my nails done AND go play with new black puppy!

the newest addition to our family!

Buckly [Buck].

11 weeks old.

yup... new black puppy is awesome. while he won't take the place of our lab, Iggy, he is a great new addition to our family and i'm SO excited that we [well, my parents really] are going to give him a good home... he was a rescue out of tennessee and so worth it.

without a new routine, i never would have had time to go play with him this morning. or, i would have, but i would have skipped the gym or getting my nails done or not made lunch or breakfast or any of that. somehow, making no resolution has helped me start to make some great changes... hopefully, we can keep it going. 

back at it

it's officially 2012 and i have blogged all of once... and i'm not even sure (without looking back at it) that i posted post 2011 which would mean so far, i'm the slacker of the year. can i be honest? of course i can, it's my damn blog... honestly, i haven't felt the inspiration to blog... the week before 2012 officially started, i was so inspired, i think by 2011 ending. i blogged and even had to save a few of my entries so i wouldn't pile too much up at once. but now, i'm at a loss for words and for anyone who really knows me, that doesn't happen often.

there are so many things contribuiting to my loss for words, at least i think so. some of them i have yet to confront head on, and others don't really require me to confront as i know  what they are and they are only having this affect on me because i'm not blogging. if that even make any sense. i haven't felt the inspiration to pin via pinterest, to post witty sayings on FB or even to really check twitter except for the occasional "there's a commercial on, let's kill the next 4.5 minutes".

i will say that i'm happy that tv shows are back to being on, and new. my thursday nights without grey's and private practice and of course jersey shore, just weren't complete. i will say, at the risk of sounding like a complete nutcase, that i enjoy Jersey Shore much more when they actually are AT the jersey shore. it makes their lack of class and rediculousness seem okay. (no disrepsect to anyone from jersey or the shore but... let's be honest... those kids do not belong in italy). okay, maybe vinny... oh shit.. stop me before i go full out JS on this blog post.....

my life is now back to a more routine schedule which is nice. and we have our first wedding of 2012 coming up which we are both really looking forward to. i think more beucase we get to spend a weekend away and neither of us are really "involved" in this wedding. and it's not family for either of us which, after a gazillion weddings, i think makes going to a wedding different. we had a slow year last year...  only 3 weddings. this year, we have 5 as of right now. plus, we have baby showers this year too... well, i have baby showers. i don't think boyfriend will be tagging along to those. it's certainly going to be a busy spring and summer... i'm looking forward to some of the places i'll get to go for these weddings though. as much as it is a pain to pack and unpack and repack and run the risk of forgetting that thing you need, especially if you are IN the wedding, i like being able to go away. this year, we are headed to new jersey, maine, the cape and virginia. we are also staying local which is equally as nice because 1. the place is awesome and 2. we will get to come home and sleep in our own bed...

for someone who had nothing to say, i just did a good deal of rambling... still, it was nothing substantial... oh well... i guess we are all entitled to some daily ramblings...

happy sunday!

Resolutions

Dictionary.com defines 'resolution' as the mental state or quality of being resolved or resolute. That's all fine and dandy and with the new year rapidly approaching (thank god) everyone is all "what's your resolution". Just today, Tall Skinny Kid was asking all of us what our resolutions are. Some were the usual, short lived, ultimately epic fail resolutions like "eat better" or "get healthy" or "go to the gym". Other's like that of Tall Skinny Kid were to eat less take out and actually utilize the kitchen in his home to cook him some meals. And I got to thinking.... Resolutions or Real-solutions... This year, I'm making a resolution that I'm already on my way to keeping (at least through the start of 2012... and by the start, I mean through Jan 1). This year, I'm going to get organized... no really. i'm going to take before and after pictures (which i'm already slacking on becuase i organized the bedroom a little bit and didn't take any pictures). I'm sure i can just take it apart and put it back the way it was and then back the way it is now but... okay anyway...

my resolution is to get organized. through my new addiction to Pinterest and the endless links to some of the most fabulous blogs ever, i have found tons of DIY projects and organizational tips and tricks to get me started. one of my newest favorite is one i stole from my aunt... we have an INCREDIBLY small bathroom. (i'm not complaining, at least we have a bathroom and it's kind of become a claim to fame.. "wow, your bathroom is really small") it is pretty tiny... so we are using simple solutions to try to fix it up... such as a shoe caddy... you know, the things you hang from the door to stick shoes in but that have shoe spots so small that boyfriends' size 13's don't fit in them? yeah one of those... turns out, it doubles as a holder for all things big and small... so we are going to add one to the back of the door to store things like the hair dryer, the lotion, extra toothbrushes... you know, that kind of thing... i'm so excited to get started reorganizing! i added one to the backside of the closet door in the bedroom too... it's perfect because it holds all my hair products that i don't use on a daily basis but might want, lotions, and medicines that i like to keep handy.

the other night, i took to organizing my pots and pans and tupperware. i went through all of it, weeding out anything that didn't have a bottom to go with a cover or a cover with a bottom. and i moved a lot of other stuff from the "pots and pans" cabinet so i have more room for my new stainless steel set that my mom got me for christmas.

so the year of organization is already in full swing... i have a laundry list of things to target, but it gives me something to look forward to, other than turning 30 in 2012... (and unlike Tall Skinny Kid, i'm not looking forward to the big 3-Oh)

my other real-solution is a little on the rediculous side. i'm going to accomplish this task thanks to my new bff Netflix. let me back up... i have an addiction to Law and Order- SVU. if it's on, I watch it, even if i've seen the episoe a bazillion times before (let's be honest, i have seen a lot of them a number of times). but there are 13 seasons and although i've seen a lot of the episodes, it has never been a show that i "follow". so this year, i'm going to watch all the episodes of SVU from Seasons 1-13, in order. This includes the ones i've already seen. So far, i'm through season 1 and onto the first few of season 2. it's a dark undertaking, but its something i know i can get through. how's that for a resolution!

what is your 2012 real-solution??

The Year in Review [Part 2]

so here it is... the rest of the year... and downhill from june, i can pretty much promise.

July 2011

High: s & b's wedding. sister's bridal shower. dad's surprise 60th

Lows: bestie moving to cali. being sick

so july had a lot to offer. 2 of my great friends got married. they got married not far from where we live and there were a lot of alumni from our college there. it was one of the most laid back, fun weddings i have EVER been in. we had a blast before, during and after the wedding. it was just a great day all around. then at the end of july, we had my sisters bridal shower. it was a great day, with a surprise visit from one of the bridesmaids who had moved to florida and her sweet little baby girl. brief visit, but so great to have them here... then my dad turned 60 and we had a surprise party [which probably wasn't a surprise] for him. it was a great time and he loved it which made it even better. at the beginning of july (okay actually the very end of june) my bestie moved to cali... i'm really happy for her that she went, but was very sad to see her leave... then at the end of july, i got the plague. no really... i had 102-104 fever. a cough. the pukes. the whole 9. i'm not sure how boyfriend didn't get sick. i ended up at the doctors and the ER and eventually, the shit worked itself out.

August 2011
High: sister's bachelorette weekend. kenny chesney. vacation with boyfriend and his family
Low: a hurricane
August started off pretty great... we spent a weekend in vermont for my sisters bachelorette- a nice low key weekend. some bar hopping. some chillin' at the house and relaxing outside. some relaxing and swimming and a weekend full of memories. i had a pretty great time and i think everyone who went did too... then i got to not only go to kenny chesney thanks to a very good friend, but i got to sit on the lawn at foxboro stadium. it was so crazy to be down where the big guys play but so awesome. we saw uncle kracker, zac brown band, billy currington and kenny. it was a great night. and the start of my vacation. the next day, we left for new hampshire for a few days with boyfriends family. we had a blast and minus my intense fall onto the boat and skin up my entire leg and watch it turn bright blue and purple, it was a great time away. did i mention we had a hurricane? yeah... the hurricane "started" at kenny chesney. us, in ponchos. soaking wet. it seriously rained the entire time we were at the concert. no. really. the entire time. i have never felt so water logged in my life.... the rain and wind continued into sunday but luckily, we had only a few trees down and now power. the same can't be said for my parents who lost their power (again)  and a bunch more trees. way to go mother nature. thanks for the big f-you.

September 2011
High: sister gets married. big e in the rain
Low: still cleaning up from the tornado AND hurricane
after our few days away, we came home, transported the dog to another house, unpacked, repacked and headed to the cape. we spent some time at the beach, time with family and then time celebrating the wedding of sister and brother-in-law. it was a great time with friends and family. lots of dancing. a great time both that night and at breakfast the next morning. boyfriend and i also went to the big e for the first time together. it was pouring rain but we had a blast. we laughed a lot and just had a great time together. but we still had clean up to do. lots of clean up. it got so bad that i had to stop helping cut trees becuase my eyes would swell shut.. thanks allergies. way to kick in at the exact time i don't need you to. please and thank you.

October 2011
High: big e. cirque for my birthday.
Low: my birthday. a lack of power for 7.5 days. and oh, a snowstorm
october started on a high note. big e again, this time not in the rain. a great time, dispite the bazillions of people. then boyfriend got me tickets to cirque de soile for my birthday. our seats weren't great- we were on the floor which i would have thought would be great, but it was harder to see than anticipated but it was incredible. and although i'm not sure boyfriend would agree, i can't wait to see another show. and then it snowed... yes, in october. they kept saying it was going to. it had been pretty warm so we didn't really think it would but on 10/29 at like, 3:00ish, it started snowing. we were having a halloween party at work and when everyone was leaving, it started to come down, hard. i drove home and showered becuase i was covered in face makup and then went out to do some quick shopping. it was snowy and windy and gross... and then at 8pm, we lost power. that was the 29th... we stayed home that night... and the next night. but by monday [my birthday] it was about 50 degrees in our house and i couldn't hang... so we made the trek to my parents to sit by the fire, sans a flushing toilet and running water, to wait it out... some birthday...

November 2011
High: thanksgiving and staind
Low: no power.... for the first 5 days of the month. saying goodbye to our dog

i feel like i have to start with the low this month... because it is a continuation of the low of october. for the first five days of the month, we had no power. we therefor, lost all our food, both frozen and otherwise. we spent five days curled up on the couch and on a matress in front of the fireplace. everything smelled like fireplace and we couldn't do laundry. awesome. and then, just a few weeks after the snow storm, and more clean up, and more trees down, we had to say goodbye to our beloved labrador, Iggy. we found out on a monday that he had a heart problem after spending the entire weekend in and out of the doggie hospital. his appointment on monday was at 10 and by 1, we were forced to say goodbye because his condition had deteriorated so rapidly that he wouldn't have made it home with us. it sucked. it's safe to say that it really effing sucked. there was a high though... thanksgiving and the staind concert were both highs. while it was sad to be at my parents for thanksgiving without big dog [our nickname for him] we laughed, a lot. and the food was pretty damn good. then on friday, after getting my hair did, we went to mohegan to see Staind. it was a relativly short, but great show and i spent the night at sister & brother-in-laws house, to wake up saturday and celebrate thanksgiving again. also a great meal.

December 2011
and here we are....
High: christmas weekend in maine. bestie coming home. christmas weekend. concert
Low: christmas shopping. missing h's birthday.

the month started with christmas weekend with my college roommates in maine. we went up to York and in addition to some pretty amazing december weather, we had a great time relaxing, laughing, eating, drinking and looking out at the ocean [which i could spend every day doing]. early last week, my bestie came back to the east coast. i got to spend friday night, part of christmas eve morning, monday night after christmas and some time on tuesday night with her and her leading man. it was the best possible christmas gift. ever. in addition to my new pots and pans [ha ha]. christmas weekend in general was a great time. we spent christmas eve with my family and christmas day with boyfriend's family. we got to wake up on christmas morning in our own house, got to open our presents very late/very early christmas eve/christmas day and just got to spend time together. it's hard to believe this is our 5th christmas together and that boyfriend moved in 5 years ago! and this weekend, to end 2011, we are going to see Rob Thomas at Mohegan Sun. Boyfriend bought me the tickets after Iggy died... <3 you boyfriend. my low was christmas shopping. not because i don't like to give gifts, becuase i do. but i am always afraid that people won't like what we get them. oh and, the closer christmas gets, the more things i feel the need to buy. whoops. not so good on the bank account. and we missed h's birthday. she turned one this year and because they live in florida now and it was so close to christmas, we couldn't make it there. and i'm sad about that... because we have been there for all the others. but we got pictures, so that helped.

it's hard to believe that 2011 is over. the first half wasn't so bad [after reliving it via these posts] but the second half sucked harder than a vacuum. big time suckage.... here's hoping 2012 has more to offer in the high department than in the low... because there are some people who can't take much more of the low...

The Year in Review [Part 1]

In 1999, The Story of Us came out, i'm not sure if to theaters but definately to dvd. my bestie and i have watched it many a time and i have to say, it's one of my top picks. there are some things that don't work in the movie, fine, but i just think it's a really true, almost scary true, account of what can happen. but i'm getting away from the point. there is a point in the movie where they are all sitting at the dinner table and talking about their highs and lows of their day. it got me to thinking on my way to work this morning about the high's and lows of 2011. Twelve months is a long time to pick one high and low, or even a few... so i'm going to try to pick a high and a low for each month of the past year...

the year in review- part 1

January 2011
High: a lot of snow.
Low: a lot of snow.
How can this be both you ask? well, the intense pounding of snow we got was enough to close down virtually everything, including work. a few of those days, even boyfriend got to stay home which RARELY happens becuase for some reason, his place of employment NEVER loses power... so we got to stay home and snuggle and play with puppy. and it's a low because... after 3 straight weeks with at least one snow storm per week- i was sick of cleaning the shit up.

this fence comes up to boyfriends waist
he's 6'3

February 2011
High: my new iphone & mary poppins
Low: even more god damn snow
I waited and waited and waited for the iphone 4 to come out and was due for an upgrade for over a year... and february granted me my new, and now favorite, phone. and i got to go to boston to see Mary Poppins (one of my favorites) with my mom and sister. the first week of february, we got two straight days of snow. and a lot of it. we had nowhere to put it. the roads were small. it was hard to drive, even down a main street and walking the dog was basically impossible...

March 2011
High: my cousin visiting
Low: not seeing boyfriend on his birthday
In march, my sister had planned to go dress shopping for her wedding.. i suprirsed her by having my cousin (who was in the wedding) fly out to try on dresses with us. it ended up being a really fun few days and a welcomed few days off. my March low will continue to be a low for every March that boyfriend has to ref. each March, his dad runs a basketball tournament and it falls on boyfriends birthday weekend... he spends the entire weekend running up and down the court which means i don't see him. it sucks. but it is what it is...

April 2011
High: Red Sox v. Yankees @ Fenway
Low: boyfriend umping... every weekend...
Lucky us, we scored some last minute tickets to the sox v. the yanks at fenway. boyfriend and i are huge sox fans. plus, the seats were pretty awesome. boyfriend had to ump for his dad's baseball league pretty much every weekend in april... made for some pretty dull and boring weekends...


May 2011
High: nothing really qualifies...
Low: boyfriend's grandfather passing away
i should have known that things were going downhill for 2011 when we found out grandpa died... the week following was filled with traveling and family and celebrating the life of a great man but in general, may sucked.

June 2011
High: NKOTBSB/First wedding of 2011
Low: Tornado
So june started off sucking and it's pretty much been downhill from there... on June 1st, we were hit with a tornado that pretty much tore apart the town and everything in it... my dad's work was closed for almost 4 months... we went without power for a while. even as i'm typing this, construction continues. it sucked. but on a high note, we got to go to a great wedding in NY with boyfriends family. we had a pretty good time and the place was amazing. great band. great drinks. great time dancing. and... i got to go see New Kids on the Block and Backstreet Boys. now i know, to some of you, that's not all that exciting but to me... it's pretty much my childhood dream come true. it was planned as a bachelorette party for one of my best college friends and it was a blast. we went out to a great dinner at this tiny hole in the wall place and then to the concert...

so that's the first 6 months of 2011 in a nutshell... the highs and lows of it all... it's a lot to take in, and to even remember but i have to be honest, because i write pretty much EVERYTHING down in my (full size) planner that my besties like to make fun of, i get to go back and relive the good, the bad and the ugly...

the next 6 months to be continued....

A brief merry Christmas post

Merry Christmas!! I'm taking this opportunity to try out boyfriends little brothers Christmas present, the ipad2. I have to say I am insanely jealous but greatful to be trying it out. Makes me want one bad!! But I did score some sweet new pots and pans and a whole mess of gift cards for some new books for the kindle so I'm prett pumped. And next week, we get the best Christmas present of all... A new puppy for my mom and dad!!

Merry Christmas everyone!! Thanks for reading. Hope everyone has a wonderful day with family and friends!!

one bag too many...

i have come to the unfortunate realization that i have too many bags. wait. before you get all crazy and start in on the but you can never have too many bags rant, hear me out.... i'm not talking purses, although for someone who doesn't really carry around too much, i have stockpiled a few too many of those as well. but i'm talking bags. like, backpacks. and gym type bags. and reusable bags that are just a tad too big to be reused and that i probably got because someone didn't want to wrap a present and the bag was cute. and ikea bags. you know, the ones you just have to have to carry out all the little things you didn't really need but just couldn't pass up? so you buy the bag to carry the crap to the car, swearing that you'll use it the next time you hike the 2 hours down to ikea and you never bring the bag and buy a new one? yeah. those kid of bags. i have a plethora of reusable bags suitable for shopping, many which are insulated thanks to the occasional special delivery from a man who i like to refer to as my work grandfather (although i'm not sure if that would offend him or if he would like it but none the less...) he brings us insulated bags and other fun treats and somehow, the insulated bags keep walking off, usually with my mother (in the off change that you read this mother, i love you). but today, as i was getting ready to leave the house to go shower b/c my ceiling was being painted and i had yet to drag my ass into the shower, i walked out onto the porch type addition to our house and realized, i have about 200 too many bags. and yet, i never seem to be able to find a bag, or the right bag, when i need it.

i also tend to leave things in bags. i have a habit (perhaps a bad one) of swapping bags like some people change their old navy flip flops. one day it's a big blue bag that is literally a bottomless pit for all things small. the next it's a bag my mom snagged me that held some free formula samples but holds SO much crap, it's amazing (i took it to a redsox game once and stashed 2 sweatshirts and a blanket. it's small but wonderful). or the ever popular vera bradley of which i have a few. or a pocketbook, although usually i don't last with those. until my most recent purchase (okay, my mom's purchase for me):

it was on sale... and it's purple... and i'm slightly obsessed with it. i got it back in october and i'm fairly certain that it's the first time i have had a bag and used it for a lengthy period of time. it fits my planner(s) and everything else i need... and did i mention it's purple? i think if i could make everything in my life purple i would... oh wait...

but seriously. other than this bag, most of the bags i have are unnecessary, at least right now. i just bought myself a new vera bag, duffle style, and have yet to throw out the old one. i bought the new one specifically to replace the old as the old has done it's duty... i've had it for probably 10 years at this point. so i have too many bags. it might be my addiction... i don't necessarily fill them, or use them, or even know that i have some of them, but for some reason, i can't seem to stop collecting them...

all these bags have solidified my need/want to start seriously organizing my house instead of just talking about it... i think i'm going to offically name 2012 as the Year of the Organization... more on that later...

counting down... 5 days...

it's hard to beleive Christmas is only a week away. i'm so looking forward to it this year, for so many reason. first and foremost, because it's time we get to spend with our families and friends. this year, i'm especially looking forward to it becuase some of my very best friends are going to be home!

Oh there's no place like home for the holidays,
'Cause no matter how far away you roam -
If you want to be happy in a million ways,
For the holidays - you can’t beat home, sweet home

this might in fact be one of my favorite christmas/holiday songs. especially as of late since so many of my friends are off to other parts of the US doing their thing. it means so much to me that when these people come home, that they can take time out of visiting with their families so that we can spend a little time together. i have been friends with these particular girls since 2nd grade (since we moved to this town). they are my heart... "... you're my heart. and you know i can't live without my heart" (blow). it's so true. these particular girls (including one who is still close enough to visit whenever we want) have been there for the good, the bad and the ugly. the akward stages. the high school drama. the college breaks and life after. the 4 of us are probably very much like the Sex and the City characters- not specially that we align to one of them each but more that we each bring something specific to the table and together are one incredible group. i'm so lucky to call each one a best friend.

best (adj): of the most excellent, effective, or desirable type or quality

given that definition, i suppose best applies to only one person. i don't necessarily agree with that. i think the definition of a best friend is the person, or people, who bring out the best in you. the people who know you. who have seen, and let, you change throughout your life. who have stuck by you no matter what the circumstance. who your parents consider their part time children. i have lots of amazing friends. i have friends from all different areas in my life. these girls in particular have helped shape me and for that, i will always be connected to them.

and i'm SO excited to spend some time with them this christmas season <3




Disclaimer: Read the disclaimers before reading the whole post...

Disclaimer to women: the following post is about men. it's about the things men do that really urk us and the things they fail to do that also urk us. it does by no means suggest that we do not love our male counterparts nor does it suggest that we are not greatful for the things they DO do for us.

Disclaimer for men: sorry, but it's pretty true... maybe it will help you to realize what really pisses us off.. we still love you. but... sometimes, we just need a little more...

Last night, after leaving work, I set out for home with the radio, and the heat, blasting. I was listening to christmas music as it's the only thing that comes in during the inital part of my drive home since I broke my car antenna shoveling the snow off the top last year. I asked boyfriend to help but.... i forget why he didn't... so instead, i broke the antenna, and proceeded to get the ever popular response "well what the hell did you do that for"... um... hence why i asked for help... but i digress. so i'm driving home and i happen to get a phone call from a friend of mine. we begin talking about, what else, men. and the conversation goes something like this...

why is it that when we ask boyfriend(s) to do something, they say "yeah sure" and then when we get home, it's exactly where we left it and it isn't until we start doing it that they realize they were gonna do it?

why is it that after i work a full day, which started with dishes or laundry before even going to work, when i ask boyfriend(s) to do something, they can't because they "worked all day"... really? and i did what? becuase last time i checked, when the paycheck comes in, it has my name on it. and it buys the groceries that feed you through the meals that i cook...

why is it that when i do something, and then ask for boyfriend(s) to finish it, they can't beause they are "watching tv" or "going for a run/to the gym". somehow, i am capable of watching tv, folding laundry and doing loads of laundry simultaneously. i am equally capable of putting a load of laundry in and doing dishes while i wait for it to finish.

i know it's the holiday season and i should be all warm and fuzzy with the one i love but maybe it's because it's the holiday season that i feel like boyfriend could step it up a notch... i do love him, please hear that loud and clear... and yes, i do voice these frustrations directly too him... i don't just blog about it... but i know i'm not the only one...

what is it that gets you?